Everything is a Horse

The shocking truth is we don’t see what we are doing most of the time. We see what we want to see. We see through the colors and filters of our minds, our preconditioned ideas and beliefs that change what is actually happening into what we “think” is happening.

There are many techniques to help see through the mind filter. I like to call this group of techniques “mirroring”. This is where an external object or person mirrors what you are really doing. One of these methods uses a horse as the mirror. Read more »

So You Want To Be A Powerful Communicator?

When Martin Luther King stood on the steps and proclaimed “I have a dream!” he did more than give a speech. On that famous day, Martin Luther King shared his vision with the world. A vision of America free of racial segregation and hatred.

When John F. Kennedy announced that he saw a man on the moon, he gave his vision to the world. And the country sprang into action to make it happen.

When those great men communicated, their power did not come from their words. Their power came from their vision. The visions they projected to the world changed the course of history and the lives of millions of people. Their visions were a map of the future.

Have you ever been talking to someone and ‘got the picture’? Have you ever been explaining something and the person you’re talking to lights up and says, “I get it”? What is this thing that we’re passing back and forth in our communication? Is it really just words that we are sending back and forth to each other? Or is there more to our communication than just the sounds that come out of our mouths?

Yes! What we are really communicating to each other is our visions.

Powerful communicators always communicate in known visions – the words they use are just signposts pointing to the vision. Poor communicators are unaware that they are sending visions, or indeed, what those visions look like.

In business, in politics, in life, we speak about where we see ourselves in the future. What do you see in your future? Your dream house, your dream job, your dream life? But what is it exactly that you are ‘seeing’? You’re seeing the vision you have created of your future. This vision is made of the same stuff and behaves in the same way as the vision that you project when you speak.

The speed at which your vision of the future becomes a reality depends on how strongly you project that vision. Just as MLK and JFK redirected the future of our world, so too your visions change the direction of your life. When MLK and JFK projected their vision of the future, they did it so powerfully that people got it, and it happened. The visions you project of yourself today are creating your life of tomorrow. That is the power of effective communication.

How powerful is your communication? Do people get what you say, do they see the picture? Or do you fail to get your point across and blame them for not listening to you?

By now I hope you can see the importance of understanding exactly what a vision is and how to use them to direct your life in the direction you want.

(Taken from Chapter 5 of “Blueprint – Change Your Life From the Inside Out”. Get your copy here)

Understanding Therapy

Unless you have graduated from university with a degree in one of the helping professions there is a chance that you will have a confusion as to what therapy is. And, because of the diversity of the subject of therapy, even qualified practitioners are unaware of what their colleagues are doing.

To add to the confusion the word ‘therapy’ has become so generic we need clarification as to what therapy is being referred to. Generally though, when we refer to therapy without specifying what therapy e.g. electrotherapy, people mean Psychotherapy

In the past a negative label was put on anyone receiving therapy. “There’s something wrong with you if you have therapy” was the usual response. Or “There’s something wrong with you if you can’t sort out your own life.” Being labelled a ‘patient’ helped to cement in this idea, adding to the idea that there was something wrong with you if you saw a therapist.

While some people have serious psychoses or neuroses problems, more and more people are seeking the help of specialized therapists in order to become more aware and capable after they have handled their immediate ‘issues’.

Unfortunately there are still many therapists who consider that their work is done when they have returned you to your ‘normal’ way of being simply because they are unaware of a ‘higher’ side of us and how to get us there.

The good news is that there are a growing number of therapists who have developed their skills not only to fix what you wanted handled but to help you discover what you are truly capable of.

Hopefully over the next few years the general concept of therapy will change so that it will be considered that there is something wrong with us if we don’t seek therapy. After all who really wants to be ‘normal’, as opposed to discovering our wonderful latent talents that lie buried within all of us?

To find these talents though we usually first have to iron out any unwanted wrinkles that life may have imposed upon us!

The difference between Therapy, Counselling, Processing and Life coaching

Psychotherapy

Many people have no idea what therapy is – they confuse it with counselling, thinking they are one and the same. To add to the confusion some therapists call themselves therapists when they are counsellors and vice – versa. So what is the difference? Very simply, when we embark on therapy we are looking at issues that haven’t just ’sprung up’ because of loss or bereavement, but have been with us for as long as we can remember, such as being overly egotistical or needy.  This entails spending at least one hour a week with a therapist for quite a long period of time to help us unravel our past and help us grow. There are also different types of therapy from different schools of thought – some good and some not so good.

Counselling

Counselling on the other hand introduces techniques that can usually help someone with a pressing issue, such as a shock or loss or bereavement that constantly fixates their attention.

This type of counselling is done intensively, maybe 10 to 20 hours in 3 – 5 days. It works best when we have been stuck in something heavy for some time and just can’t seem to pull ourselves out of it. But it doesn’t handle the basic underlying cause why we reacted so adversely to the situation. For example: We are devastated because our boyfriend/girlfriend has left us for someone else. We go to counselling to handle the feelings of loss, neediness and abandonment and bounce back again ready for the next romance. Or we just find someone to replace the old lover. The same thing happens again and we, again, seek our counsellor for a ‘fix’, never addressing the underlying cause of the feelings of loss, neediness and abandonment that usually stem from events in our infanthood. For this we need therapy as it usually takes a long time to find the underlying cause

Whatever we choose – a therapy route or a counselling route – the speed of just how quickly one deals with one’s issues depends on the shape of the person wanting the therapy. If we have seen life as a glass that is half empty as opposed to a glass that is half full it is possible that gains may come a little slower. And even here there is no hard and fast rule. If you have seen life as a glass that is half full but are experiencing only a temporary bad patch - as most of us do from time to time - its quite possible that it will be resolved quite quickly. In such cases the therapist may use counselling tools to help or will send you to a counsellor. All going well you should be back to your old self, bright eyed and bushy tailed!

Psychologists

Confusion again! There are many types of psychologists, all coming out of university with different labels. There are Behavioural psychologists, Industrial psychologists, Counselling psychologists, to name but a few.

Psychologists are not necessarily therapists as they may, in their studies, have concentrated more on diagnosis and may choose to evaluate what they feel is wrong with you rather than go through the lengthy process of therapy.  This may either resolve or – should the evaluation be wrong – complicate the problem.

Life Coaching.

Life Coaching is also becoming popular and is useful when we just can’t seem to see the wood for the trees.  Good coaches are able to steer you into areas of your life that refuse to work out and by using a series of questions allow you to spot where you are going wrong.

Processing.

Because counselling uses techniques or processes, some schools of thought use the term processing to describe the one on one work that takes place between a counsellor and a client.

whatmakesyoutick.com and pauldrayton.com encompass all of the above to suit the particular issues the client feels they need to address

By Colin Mills

Blueprint Workbook – Techniques For Transformation and Success

This workbook contains exercises and insights built on the principles described in “Blueprint: Change Your Life From the Inside Out”. It is a practical step-by-step guide to personal transformation and success for anyone who is prepared to take action to achieve their goals.

The Blueprint Workbook is packed with techniques, strategies and methods to apply the Blueprint in your daily life. It is designed to take you seamlessly from the knowledge of the Blueprint to effective action in your life. The step-by-step process means that by the time you finish your workbook, you will be well on your way to achieving your goals. And you’ll understand exactly what you did, and why it worked. If it didn’t work, you’ll know why and have the energy and know-how to try it again more successfully.

Master the powerful techniques in this workbook and you will:

· See the invisible world around you, and work in harmony with it
· Use the power of emotion to accelerate your goals
· Learn powerful interpersonal skills
· Erase subconscious mental obstacles
· Create realistic plans you can achieve
· Measure and correct your progress towards your goal
· Free yourself from the effects of unwanted emotions
· Learn everyday skills that make your life more enjoyable and fulfilling

The Blueprint Workbook is 116 pages of techniques for personal transformation and success, painstakingly collected from years of experience and practice. Drawing on methods and techniques from a variety of sources that have been proven to work through my years as a professional life coach and clearing practioner (clients paid up to $250 an hour to work with me), this workbook is packed with information and exercises you are unlikely to find anywhere else.

From igniting the first spark of an idea, to building emotional energy to drive it forward, to practical planning and self-management techniques, this workbook covers it all. It even has interpersonal skills development. You can view the table of contents here.

By the time you finish this easy to read, fun to apply workbook, you will have more confidence, more certainty, and more fun achieving your goals. Not only that, you will experience self-confidence and fulfilment as you understand what is happening and why. You will be relaxed in the face of stress and opposition, knowing you have the skills and knowledge to handle whatever life throws at you.

To get your copy of the workbook select the option you would like below. As usual, my 100% Risk Free Guarantee applies. If you don’t like the Blueprint Workbook for any reason, simply let me know and you will be refunded 100% of the purchase price.

Blueprint Workbook:
	Paperback $24.97 (FREE shipping inside USA)
Blueprint Package (Blueprint & Blueprint Workbook)
+	Both Paperbacks $35 (FREE shipping inside USA)

As a coach I can only help one person at a time, and not everyone can afford me. I wrote these two books so that you can learn to help yourself to achieve your goals, become more confident and realize your own power. If you get the package deal it means I can start helping you achieve your goalsright here, right now. I like that. I think you will too when you see how much easier it is when you have a clear road map of success that makes sense to you and fits your personality and focus.

Start by reading “Blueprint: Change Your Life From the Inside Out” . When you’ve discovered the secrets of using the Blueprint in your life, you can immediately start applying them by learning the skills in the Workbook. Together “Blueprint: Change Your Life From the Inside Out” and the “Blueprint Workbook” are a complete step by step guide to taking solid, practical steps towards your goals, and growing as a person at the same time.

To Your Success and Self-Realization,

Paul Drayton

As always, feel free to email or call me if you have any questions, comments or suggestions. I’d love to hear from you.

paul@changeyourblueprint.com
ph. 1-904-373 8366

Kid Motivation – The Star Chart

The document Star Chart is a simple chart you can use to motivate your child to behave positively.

Basically, you give them a red, green or gold star depending on their behavior – getting to bed by themselves on time, brushing their teeth, good grades, whatever you agree on with them is appropriate behavior. The rules are on the back of the chart.

All you have to do is print it out and stick it on the fridge with a sheet of sticky stars (available for a dollar or 2 at deparment stores or stationary stores).

What children get what stars for is up to you and them to work out. We give green stars for positive behavior such as brushing teeth themselves on time, doing their assigned chores without being asked, etc. We give a gold star for each 100% they bring home from tests at school. Red stars are given for not doing what they agreed to do. The Star Chart is here.